Murphy's Love Laws
1.All the good ones are taken.
2.If the person isn't taken, there's a reason. (corr. to 1)
3.The nicer someone is, the farther away (s)he is from you.
4.Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant.
5.The amount of love someone feels for you is inversely proportional to how much you love them.
6.Money can't buy love, but it sure gets you a great bargaining position.
7.The best things in the world are free --- and worth every penny of it.
8.Every kind action has a not-so-kind reaction.
9.Nice guys(girls) finish last.
10.If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.
11.Availability is a function of time. The minute you get interested is the minute they find someone else.
THE FRANKLIN FACTOR:
Early to bed and early to rise means it's time to meet more guys.
THE RAT RACE:
If there's one rat in a room full of nice men, he'll hit on you
first.
THE EYEGLASS PRESCRIPTION:
Don't wear your glasses on a blind date. You'll look better, and
he will too.
THE RING RULE:
A watched telephone never rings.
THE CREEP CALL:
Never pick up the phone on Saturday night. It's a call from a
creep you told you were busy.
THE FISHING FORECAST:
They say there are lots of good fish in the sea. But who wants to
go out with a fish?
THE PSYCHOLOGICAL PROGNOSIS:
Love is a form of temporary insanity curable only by marriage.
THE ROPE TRICK:
Give a man enough rope and he'll lasso another woman.
MIND OVER MATTER:
No one ever falls in love with another person's mind, at a
cocktail party.
THE FAULT FINDER:
The faster way to discover all your bad habits, is to move in
with your lover.
THE UNINTENED RESULT:
1) Men's desire for sex sometimes results in intimacy.
2) Women's desire for intimacy often results in sex.
THE RABBIT RULE:
Only newlyweds and liars make love every day.
THE DANGLE DOCTRINE:
You can't keep a good man down.
TWAIN'S TRUTH:
Familarity breed children.
THE FERTILITY FACTOR:
Women are only fertile a few days each month unless they're
single.
THE PREPARATION PREDICAMENT:
The longer you spend in the bathroom preparing for sex, the more
likely he's fallen asleep by the time you're ready.
Next: